WK11: The phantom

The phantom is a mysterious  clocked figure.  It hunts at night it has been 100 years since any one has seen it. This boy shall we call him the boys name is Jack he can seal demons. So one day Jack gos hunting for the phantom usual the phantom appears at 8:00pm and is always near shops. Armed with this knowledge Jack fond the phantom black clouds of smoke poring out of it Jack fires his demon sealing power the phantom fires its sole steling black magic. They both collide but Jack is stronger and wins the duel and seals the phantom.

2 thoughts on “WK11: The phantom”

  1. Hi Jamie,
    Thank you for your 100WC entry this week. I enjoyed reading it, especially as you have used some interesting ideas and vocabulary. I especially liked that your character could ‘seal demons’ and how you have used the word ‘collide.’ There is a sentence near the beginning, which says
    ‘This boy shall we call him the boys name is Jack’
    I think you might have changed your mind about what it was going to say when you were in the middle of writing it. Try to make sure that before you post your writing, you read it through aloud so that you can check if all your writing makes total sense. It will help spot these little mistakes and make your writing even better.
    Keep working hard with your writing.
    Mrs McG (Team 100WC)
    Derbyshire, England

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